All Change (Part 1)

Having entered a clutch of races in July and one in August, I have celebrated by losing 3 kilograms and changing my club. Having been at Dundee Hawkhill as second claim member since 2005, I failed to pay the increased subs on time and after a couple of short emails, I found myself having left the club. I don’t read my emails too often and failed to heed the requests. Dohh. Anyway,  I don’t know too many folk there anymore and a change is as good as a rest. Soo, having had such a good time on the trails of Fife earlier this year, I was accepted into the ranks of the psycho sqwerls (squirrels), and should be donning the baby blue vests of the Falkland Trailrunners soon. I got onto their Strava page early and was later accepted to their facebook page after stumping up a very reasonable twelve peanuts and an acorn.

The Sunderland 5k is not until the 22^nd of July and with a little bit of time, I thought I would enter the Middlesborough 5000 metres on the 10^th,  hoping for a 'sub twenty', I am in Heat A at 5.40pm. I have checked out the opposition and think I should be well up. 

The carbohydrate and incahol intake has been slashed and I am working daily on fortifying my core with a series of exercises that threaten to expunge the remaining shag pile on the bedroom carpet. I'm aiming for the rippled washboard effect, that Roman centurion look. I have also been down the track 3 times over 3 weeks and while this hardly represents a commitment of an Olympian, it does, at least provide a foundation for some enhanced running.  The bike has been parked up for 3 weeks now as my mileage creeps up to fifty a week. Not much speed I grant you, but I need to be sensible. 

Today I need to get round each km in less than 4 minutes to dip under the 20 minute mark. I have changed my garmin from miles to km's. Not having a race since March 2020, I am very light on recent experience and admit to feeling a little apprehensive. I added to my recent battery of commitment by buying a pair of Brooks Glycerin last week and they seem just the job. I won’t bother with my spikes; too much potential for achilles damage. 

When I was out earlier this week pounding the lanes, I was in a reflective mood. Why am I putting myself through the mill again? There’s nought wrong with running for pleasure, surely? Well, If I can stay fit, I reasoned with myself that I should try and be the best I can. After all, I might, one day, not be able to race at all. That day is getting nearer each year. I am also inspired by one of my training buddies who has reached the No. 1 ranking in his age group and the kids, who continue to run well, although that said, two of the trio are laid up with ankle trouble.  I have had an easy morning with a short 2 mile run and some stretching followed by coffee and leek soup at lunchtime. I always go well on soup. I’ve had a short nap and I reckon I’m as ready as I will ever be. Lets hope there’s not too much smog on Teesside and I manage to remember my club vest, safety pins and how to find my way to the finish line Wish me luck....

North East 50m TT: Wake Up (& smell the emollient)

 

In preparation for the 50 mile time trial on the 6th June (yes, D.Day), I gave the bike a good clean. This included stripping down the rear cogs (cassette) and cleaning all the muck off. I re-assembled the cogs and tightened the lockring. I then took it out for a couple of miles to check all was well. Later, checking the details of the event and gathering all my bits n' bobs I felt I had prepared well. I had even got in some Genoa Cake and sliced up a couple of small slabs, wrapping them in clingfilm.  I also fitted a bottle cage for a bottle of juice to keep me hydrated. I invited some of the family along for support, telling them that they could appear and leave as they wished. I reckoned that I would be on the road for between 2:15 and 2:30hrs depending on how things went, so there was no trouble about catching me along the 'there and back' course between Cramlington and Amble. For an entry fee of ten quid, this event presented unrivalled value for money!

Race Day: I arrived early on Sunday Morning at around 7:30am just as the small car park was filling up. The smell of testosterone, WD40 and emollient was in the air, but not from me. I signed up and dug out the bike as the sun began climbing into the early morning sky. I signed on and admired the trophies. It was the closest I was to come to any of them. Local Legends such as Waugh, Walker and Bradshaw writ large on the plaques. 

There were 20 women in the 90 strong field, but the organiser had decided to send them off first and they had all taken off to the start, leaving me with a bunch of younger male adults who, collectively, could probably power a small village with the watts they were about to generate. I elected for a modest warm up. However, it soon became clear that the bike had developed a rattle. I checked the cassette at the back and, sure enough, it was a little loose. Too late now to send for the cavalry. I arrived at the start with 2 minutes to spare cutting it a little fine, and 2 minutes later I was clocking 24mph down the dual carriageway toward the coast road. I hadnt even got off this stretch of the road, however, before I was passed. We were only 4 minutes into the race. Another came barrelling past at 7 minutes and this procession of sleek, bronzed and shaved near-silent whirring assassins came and went throughout the 2hours 20minutes that I was on the road. 

As I made a good impression of pounding my way past Ellington then Widdrington with my complaining quads, droplets of sweat rolled down my visor. At about 18 miles I dug out a tablet of cake. This is why gels were invented. Trying to wrestle open a crumbly clingfilm wrapped square while riding at 'speed' is tricky, never mind finding enough moisture in your mouth and gaps between your heaving breaths to masticate the thing to an adequate level of turgid fruity gooiness in order to swallow it. I turned at Amble and was on the return leg. By this time the team car had turned up. Missus Mac Wielded the Nikon from a safe distance on the verge, revelling in the pictures of an exhibition, like something from a night on bald mountain. After a few more miles, I noticed that there were crumbs of fruitcake and a raisin that had fallen from my mouth still sitting on my outstretched, sticky glistening arm. My gaze returned to them a couple of times over the following miles before I reluctantly diverted my attention to clearing my arm. Could this fruit cake really be slowing me down.  I am surprised that Clive Barker has not yet used the experience of a 50 mile time trial as the central plot for one of his ghoulish stories. Torture. I had to remind myself to keep drinking. 

Blyth eventually loomed into view, but not soon enough. The traffic was definitely picking up. Two boy racers came careering past before cutting across me to take the slip road.  I didn't have the energy to swear under my breath. This sort of behaviour is why I rarely go down the coast when out training. I was tiring badly at 40 miles as the scratchman, number 90 came past. Using my enhanced mathematical skills I worked out that he was about half an hour in front of me, timewise. How can this be?

I had long given up on my supposed 'aero' position and mused that if I had perhaps grabbed a deliveroo bag I might have at least made myself a few quid riding miles and miles for nothing. I rallied a little in the last 3 miles, but the clock crept over the 20 minute mark and as I passed the line I was, I suppose, mostly relieved that the bike had not failed somewhere out there or that I had been cruelly mown down on a faceless stretch of dual carriageway. I counted magpies, 2 hedgehogs, 1 fox and a seagull, all of which had tried and failed to beat the traffic. Time to think about a bike fitting and re-assessing my aims for the sporting season, perhaps. I pedalled slowly back to the car park which was reassuringly empty.

I packed the bike up, being careful not to burn my fingers on the glowing hubs and molten tyres (aye, right) and handed my number back to race HQ. I was 60th out of 65 finishers. There were a good handful of folk ahead of me that I've beaten on the previous 2 outings. However, maybe I should stick to the shorter distances on more rolling circuits. Don't get me wrong, I was pretty pleased with my debut appearance at this distance. It is obviously a distance that you need to train for. Pleased to have done it and ticked another off 'the list'.

   

Sit up and Mambeg

 Apart from a couple of ‘incidents’, I enjoyed last weeks bank holiday weekend. With the sun working hard to make an appearance each day through the eastern haar, I managed 25 miles with the dark destroyer on Friday. We did have a rather unpleasant altercation with a motorist who took it upon himself to drive within a foot of us in order to shout his opinion on the highway code out the window. We had an adverse reaction to this and I’m a little surprised that we haven’t caught ourselves on a video clip on facebook from one of the drivers stuck behind the resulting rammy.  Saturday saw me up at the time trial in Embleton in North Northumberland. It was cool and misty. There was quite a big field for this 12 miler. I had two women in front of me and a no-show, so plenty of work to do. I cracked on and was careful at the first junction not to cross over the white lane. However on the long stretch south I was baulked by five cars behind a caravan all of which were trying to get past a rider from Alnwick. Travelling at the speed of the rider in front, I became increasingly frustrated and eventually snapped, overtaking the car in front. As I rode along the white line, another car came around the bend and I realised there was little space and I might soon be history, squashed in the white line of duty. Thankfully, I breathed in and the car passed without any problem, but as I pulled back in, I felt stupid and had learnt my lesson and waited for all the cars to pass and then passed the rider in front. Not my best moment. Long story short, I was passed by the Muckle CC rider, but caught the two in front and finished again in ‘mid table glory’ with an average on a sporting course of 22mph.  

Eager to get the miles in before my big 50 miler on the 6th June, I met my buddy Steve on Sunday morning and we rode north eastwards up through Warkworth and up the coast eventually turning at Craster. On the return there was a cold easterly coming off the sea, but we moved a little inland and by Felton the sun came out and it was a pleasant 70 miler and almost 3000 calories expended.  Two squares of Genoa Cake kept me going. 

Monday was a seven mile run round the woods. I am aware of my changing physiology and felt heavier as I truckled around the bluebells and blooming wild garlic.

The Dumbarton job at the former Jaconellis is coming to a close so on Tuesday I went back up to take the final readings. This took around 20 minutes. I had clocked the weather forecast and had brought the bike. I took the opportunity to drop off the car at nearby Cardross and, packing my jersey pockets with a tube, tyre levers, pump, glasses and mobile, I took off on the bike in warm cloudy conditions through Helensburgh and up past Faslane turning left at Gareloch down the peninsula to Roseneath.  As I pedalled toward the village, I was passed by a lean grizzled bloke on a hybrid with knobbly tyres. I didn’t think he would maintain the speed so I tucked in about 3 or 4 metres behind. Sure enough he began to slow after a mile or two. As I considered passing him I looked behind I saw the outline of a powerful bikie catching both of us. He powered past in his brown jersey and shorts which sported a ‘outlaw’ brand. Grizzled man behind shouted for me to catch the outlaw and get a free tow. I duly obliged and we enjoyed a 21mph tow to a little hill at the entrance to the village of Clynder, whereupon the outlaw stated he couldn’t find his inner ring. I realised this wasn’t a euphemism, an admission of his spiritual state, but rather that he was having a mechanical. Being the diminutive rider that I am, I surfed up the short ascent and he was a distant memory. I think the grizzled hybrid turned off shortly afterwards. As I reached the tip of the Peninsula the road kicked up in good style. As I changed down to the small chainwheel, I glanced back only to see the dark figure of the Outlaw careering along the road behind me. However, I was fairly sure that his speedy antics on the flat wouldn’t translate well on the hills toward Cove. As I crested the hill there was no sign of him.

I rode on up the coast to Coulport. I was hoping there would be a shop there, but there’s nothing there but the navy base. Hello Sailor. I elected to go ‘ovethetop’ and take the high road cut though down to Mambeg and toward Gareloch. As I turned left a huge hill presented itself in front of me and it took all my effort not to get off and walk. It’s a long long time since I zig-zagged up an incline and had broken into a quality sweat by the time I got to the top. My heart rate monitor was fizzing. There was a little bit of dribble on the side of my mouth.  Coming down the other side I had a full view of Faslane. It’s a wee town on its own and there’s new building still going on. I guess it’s a big employer in the area. I stopped for a ribena and macaroon bar at the Spar in Gareloch and then set off again for the last 10 miles of my 40 miler.  As I cycled through Helensburgh I noticed Humbles, my fave café, was full, so I ended up on the front sitting outside a sandwich bar with a cheese and tuna panini and a cuppa. I got talking to an old bloke who told me he cycled 20 miles a day, every day and was complimentary about the old jalope. He left shortly afterwards, only to be replaced by another random bloke who also wanted to talk bikes. However, I had to get off and get back down the road before the traffic around Glasgow and Edinburgh built up.  The number of cars on the roads at present is crazy. All folk who might, on any other year, might be on a plane to some foreign clime.   

There's a radio programme doing the rounds called Time and presented by Armando Iaunucci. It concludes that in order to slow time, you need to make new memories and get into new places to stimulate the brain. I think this is my new mission. Upwards to the next ride or adventure.      

Knee trembler

I've just had a very good couple of days. The come back is not quite established but its definitely waiting in the wings. With the re-commencement of cycling early last month, my knee ligament flared and reacted poorly to the novel action of hard pedalling. Apparently there is no such thing as ‘muscle memory’ as far as my left leg goes. Prior to this, I had work in Kirkcaldy and enjoyed running both east and west along the Fife Coastal Path. It really is a terrific day out with lots of old castles, churches, caves and what not.

Anyway, my dodgy knee has meant I’ve replaced running with cycling and have easily been clocking 100 miles a week on two wheels, some of that at or near to 20mph. This excess of fresh air and lycra resulted in me entering a 12 mile time trial. With no running races, I wasn’t missing any events as far as athletics goes. I had eyed a longer hilly time trial, but had a late but refreshing realisation that I was not in that kind of shape.  

The event took place on Saturday. It was the Tyne and Wear Fire and Rescue ‘12’ based on the circular route around Stamfordham, just south west of Newcastle. Its not a standard distance so there was no pressure of ‘PBing’ going on. I was off no. 88. Very apt. The course was described as ‘sporting’, which means its an uppy-downy affair. I arrived, signed on and jogged around the village for a mile to get my heart rate up. The sun was up and a gentle easterly meant good conditions. It was only the second outing for my Planet X t.t. bike, bought second hand from a nice man in Selkirk last year. Maybe it was more than a year ago?  Who can keep track during these covid groundhog days and months.  

Anyway,  I lost around 5 or 6 seconds trying to get my shoe cleat in the pedal at the start. Normally, pre-covid, you would get held up and could start all clipped in, but not anymore. Richardson of Derwentside was a laughy, jokey no 87 in front of me, but I didn’t share his nervous energy, and never saw him again after the start. No 89 came past after 6 miles or so and then a whirring Ben Lane (90) some time later. I focused on both riders to drag me to a finish time of 32 minutes and a very respectable 55^th place out of a full field of 120. The dark destroyer and H. had ridden out to give me support which I appreciated. Maybe a sporting course favours my diminutive build. In response, I have entered another short event in North Northumberland at the end of May and then, in a minute of brain meltdown, a 50 miler early in June. I will have to get the miles in for the latter.Either that,or get an electric bike.

 

On Monday morning, after dropping off the wee man to nursery, I drove to Warkworth, fancying a 6 miler to Alnmouth and back. Theres a coastal route which is part of St Oswalds Way. Who Knew? I hit the sandy path behind the dunes on empty beaches and jogged around to Alnmouth and then continued up to Boulmer where, after 8 miles I turned around. I spent most of the time on the beach on the return leg and stopped after 12 miles at Alnmouth Golf Club for a corned beef and pickle sannie and a cuppa. Alnmouth was busy. 

All in all, it was a 17 mile run which was a wee adventure. I admit there was a little excess chaffing down there, but it was a poultry price to pay for such a grand day out. I will return to do another bit of the Oswalds Way soon. There’s also St Cuthberts Way. I’ve been down to Spennymoor in Durham (again, on work) and picked up 6 miles of the Auckland Way; When the suns out these off road trails offer a terrific alternative and you feel you can go all day on an easy pace. I’m already on 20 miles after 2 days this week and have looked at all the trail runs available in Scotland – there’s plenty to go at. With the back end of work to finish in Dumbarton, I have also recently been mooching around Helensburgh, Rhu and Roseneath with the bike. I can see myself spending more time exploring these trails and quiet roads. I’ve not totally given up racing, but life’s short and I’m not as spritely as I was.  There is a 10k being organised on a nearby airstrip. However, the £23 entry fee means I won't be crossing the profiteering organisers palm with silver anytime soon. His prizes are often another entry to one of his events! 

I should add that, since my last blog, the dream team of the dark destroyer, Linds and Cat formed the womens A team for Morpeth Harriers and won a bronze in the North East XC champs, so I was chuffed about that. I was even mentioned in the race report - but that was for transgressing too near the course to try and get some snaps. I was chased away by a man in a yellow bib...my knees were trembling, I can tell you! 

Having finished Heinlein’s satisfying ‘Starship Troopers’, not like the film at all, I am back on Faulks with ‘Engleby’.  I have a bit of a backlog on the reading front, having spent this last few weeks on decorating duties.  Anyway, the suns out and the forecast is pants for tomorrow and Friday, so I better get out. Bike today. The good news, I guess, is that with the vague promise of the lifting of these pandemic measures (as consistently as effective as syrup in a colander) there might be, just might be, a chance of more to blog about, so strap yourself in for an update soon.  toot, toot.

Its alive...

 

Bless me father for I have transgressed. It’s been 2 or 3 months since I last blogged. In that time I have mostly mooched about and lost contact with reality. My 2007 Mortlach is finished and has been replaced by a Glendullan of the same age and hue. They could be the same whisky.The heating is on again and the gardens a state. who cares?

The cold weather that marked the middle of February has given way to much milder conditions and with it, my mileage has recovered. It’s a pleasure to get out in a short sleeved top as the thermometer nudges into double figures. I clocked three ten mile runs over the weekend, threading my way through the linked couples and threesomes who have resurrected that old social ritual of promenading, even if they lack, in some cases, its craft.  Half of them in great long downy padded coats that look like they’ve inadvertently come out wearing their sleeping bag.

I have noticed that it’s a struggle on some days when starting a run to get my heart rate up and, as a result some slow starts simply develop into slow sessions. The snow, when it arrived, was a joy to run through and my heart soared as I tramped through the woods with the snow flakes cascading down falling between the branches above. It was an easterly and the snow was that kind of a crunchy affair. I tumbled across a dear tentatively lunching on a bush. It darted down the bank and into the iced undergrowth. I didn’t have my camera with me anyway. Later I heard a woodpecker.  Somehow a little comforting to bump into wildlife. That made the expiry of the mouse we caught in a humane trap in the garage that bit sadder. It was cold by the time I got to it. I found another one dead in the back garden. It looked like a cat had caught it. Tough times for mice.

I am plodding through Archer’s ‘Kane and Abel’ which according to the inside cover has been re-published more times than I’ve put the kettle on. With the charity shops closed, I have had to revert to amazon to source my reading material. I’ve had a good run so far this year with O’Hagan’s  ‘Mayflies’, an introspection of a coming of age and, later, the death of a friend; Francine Toons gothic tale ‘Pine’ and Hanif Kureishi’s ‘Intimacy’.  I enjoyed Patricia Highsmith’s ‘the Talented Mr Ripley’.  I’m sure there’s been another that I have forgotten but the bookcase beside my bed has been cleared in preparation for some decorating.  A likely story.  Alberto Tyszka’s ‘Sickness’ arrived today and I’m expecting David Nivens autobiography later this week. There's still Stephen King and some Heinlein to get through Got to keep it varied.

I have checked the NHS website today and it’s the 60 year olds plus that can step up for their dose of the future. Some of the running buddies have had it already and they’ve had no adverse reaction, so that’s reassuring.  There is some talk of the Parkrun being restored early in June.  That’s still at least 12 weeks way.  We’re in danger of our lives drifting away with this lockdown business. I might become a solitary bee. I have singularly failed to re-invent myself over the last 12 months. I really should have grasped the downtime more firmly to learn something new. That said, I haven’t been furloughed and, until last week, was pretty busy, so I can cut myself some slack.  The glimmer of light was a 19:48 minute 5k, 3 weeks ago on my todd.  However, that form wasn’t reproduced as I clocked in a 43 minute 10k a fortnight later for the club virtual handicap thingy.  Still, God loves a trier. There’s more chance of some cycling time trials arriving before running events, so I’d better dig out the bike again. I put in an enquiry to Dundee Thistle and I might pay my twenty quid and buy one of their striped orange creations if theres any that fit.

Marg had a trip yesterday when she was out running and is off work today with a hurty shoulder.  The daughters' are all treading water in terms of their athletics.  Difficult to get yourself motivated. Aunt Aggies in the kitchen and torturing me with smells of fresh leek and potato. and that’s just her smalls.. With no bread this morning in the bread bin, I dug out some flour and yeast and I’m now in charge of something forming slowly in the front room. It’s morphing into a creature from a John Carpenter film, rising with modest threat over the radiator in the front room.  Not sure if I’ll bake it or use it to re-tile the bathroom. I’ll let you know the outcome.